Ask Anonymous 3.0

To see previous editions of this column, click here. Click here to submit your own questions to be answered in an upcoming edition of Ask Anonymous.

Q: How do I get this girl to notice me even if she thinks I’m a loser? 

A: Chances are that this girl doesn’t actually think you’re a loser. The first step to getting her attention is to be more confident and positive about the situation. Not only does self-confidence attract people, but if you walk around with the mindset that she thinks you’re a loser then you’ll never work up the courage to actually act on your feelings. Though it may seem a little nerve-wracking, I strongly recommend that you strike up a conversation with your crush. After all, talking to her is really the only way you can guarantee you’ll get her attention and is the only way to truly get to know her – Twitter feeds and Instagram pages don’t always reflect someone’s true personality, people. Try bringing up something that the two of you have in common, like a band, sports team, or even the homework from the class you’re both in (if you have a class together), to make the conversation feel more natural.


Q: Is PEI worth visiting? 

A: It depends. On a scale of 1-10, how much do you appreciate Anne of Green Gables?


Q: How do I politely get people to walk faster in the halls? 

A: I wish I had a concrete answer to this! There’s nothing worse than being caught behind what seems like a line of tortoises on your way to class, and unfortunately there isn’t really a polite way to get them to hurry up. I’m afraid your best option in this situation is to excuse yourself around the slow walkers or just wait patiently and hope they turn a corner at some point.

If you’re reading this and have caused a traffic jam in the hall by walking at a speed snails would marvel at or by blocking three-quarters of the hallway to talk to your friends at their lockers, please reconsider your actions and remember that it is never too late to change your ways and be born anew. Sincerely, Ask Anonymous and most likely the rest of the student body.


Q: Are the seniors going to pull off a prank this year? 

A: Only time will tell, my friend… only time will tell.


Until next time.

-A